Last night I went out my first love - my high school boyfriend who I went out with for 3 years. We go to the same college and are still very good friends. We went out for dinner and to catch up and talk. He is engaged to be married this summer.
It's so strange how everytime we get together it's almost like nothing has changed. We can always pick up where we left off and never have any awkward silences or moments. He's always been there for me over the years whenever I was upset or sad or needed him. And he's always the person I call when I need to talk to someone.
We broke up over 2 years ago right before my sophomore year of college. We fought a lot and because it was both of our first relationship, I felt like we needed to experience other things and date other people.
It is hard to see someone you love and will probably always love with someone else and planning a wedding. It sucks. I love this guy more than anything in the world and probably always will. I know that we will never get back together and I wouldn't want to because us as a couple just didn't work. Neither of us would be happy.
But yet I continue to love him and want him to be a part of my life. I always kind of thought it was crap about how you will always love your first love but apparently it's true. I have had many other boyfriends that have come and gone and just like them so does my love for them or whatever feelings I had. This guy is the only guy that I have continued to love and want to be in my life.
Why is that? What is it about a first love that makes the heartbreak last forever? Why do those feelings continue to linger? Why can't you just get over it and move on as we do with other breakups and relationships. I really think I need to read "It's a Breakup Because It's Broken." Maybe that would give me some insight. Any advice?
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