Monday, July 02, 2007

Cube Farm Claims Another

An ode to my buddy over at Water the Blog:

A local woman was found dead on Monday afternoon in her cubicle. Apparent cause of death: boredom. Anita Break, 23, was found slumped over her computer keyboard with her iPod still thumping away. Multiple Excel spreadsheets and several technical papers were open on her computer.

Break was heard saying at 1:23, "If I see one more report, I'm going to croak." At 2:24 p.m., she opened an e-mail from co-worker Justin Time with a paper for her editing. The coroner said Break passed away at 2:25.

Justin Time came by at 3 to pick up the edits only to find Break dead. He was distraught to think he was to blame.

"I had no idea she was so bored," he said. "If I had known that, I would have sent her the other report I needed editing - one about the rapid decay of Missouri's caves. She would have loved it and would still be with us today. I guess I'll have to send it to Ryan Tin.

Ryan Tin was later found dead in his cubicle. The coroner is still investigating.

3 comments:

Matt said...

Hooray!!!!! Updates!!!!

If I ever need a field reporter, I know who to ask.

(Hmmm... rapid decay of caves... since caves are holes, does that mean they are getting bigger or smaller? ...my brain hurts.)

Revee said...

Just so you know, you were Ryan Tin in my fictional story and I was Anita Break!

Matt said...

I prefer my nickname, "Ry"

Nicely done. I'm stealing shamelessly.