aSomehow I mustered up the courage to send Brad packing. It wasn’t easy but I knew it was what I needed to do. Because at the end of the day he was going back to The Devil and I knew it. And as angry as it made me that she had won and she had got the guy, my guy; I knew it was for the best. They were having a kid together and no matter how much I loved him, I couldn’t – wouldn’t – stand in the way of that.
Brad fed me some line about how he would always love me and that he hoped we could continue to be friends. I nodded and pretended to feel the same but the only thing I hoped is that I never had to see him or his whore ever again. The fact that I knew he wasn’t “The One” didn’t make my heart hurt any less because the fact of the matter was that I was starting all over. Back at square one. I was a single again and that was the loneliest feeling in the world.
I woke up on Monday exhausted but relieved. It hadn’t been easy to hear but I felt like Brad had finally given me the closure I needed to put this who fiasco behind me and start living again. I didn’t quite feel like a new woman but I felt like a better woman.
I made the decision to pick myself off the couch and return to work. My only hope was that I had a job to return to. I even took a shower and did my hair and makeup for the first time since the almost wedding. If I was going to do this, if I was going to start over, I was going to do it with my best face forward.
I arrived at work about 15 minutes early but the office was already bustling. As I made my way to my cubicle, several people nodded or waved hello while others gave me half pity smiles. I bit my lip and smiled back. I would not be a train wreck. I would not show my weakness. I had almost made it to my cube when Amy, the secretary and queen of all things gossip crossed my path.
“Oh, Addy!” She wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tightly. “It’s so great to see you back. We weren’t sure we would ever see you again. How are you doing?”
She was looking me over from head to toe to see if she could find any sign of weakness. Had I mismatched my socks? Were my pants wrinkled? Did my shirt have a stain? Had I been crying? I had made sure the answer to all of those questions was no.
“I’m doing great. Thanks for asking, Amy. How are you doing?” I hoped that by changing the subject she would let it rest.
“Well, I’m doing good but I didn’t just have my heart broken. Oh, Addy, it was so tragic. I don’t know how you did it.”
She had to go there. I knew she couldn’t let it rest.
“I don’t know that I would call it tragic. A blessing is really more accurate.”
Bewilderment flashed in her eyes. Why did I have to run into Amy my first day back? She was only going to dig for dirt so she could spread it around the office. Did you hear about Addy? Her fiancé left her at the altar and she was so devastated she nearly committed suicide. I heard she tried to kill herself but wasn’t even successful in that. Poor thing.
I was not going to be anyone’s poor thing. And I was not going to be the butt of office jokes and the subject of office rumors. I would set her straight right here and now.
“Oh, Addy. You know you can talk to me if you need to. I’m always right up there.” She pointed to her desk at the front of the office.
“As much as I would love to spill my life story to you, Amy, everyone knows that it would only be a matter of minutes before you had spilled it to everyone else in the office. So thanks but no thanks. If I wanted to be the subject of office whispers, I would have just called Page Six.”
Her mouth dropped and she turned in a huff. At least now she would have something to talk about the rest of the day. I’m sure she would say that my almost wedding had turned me into an evil bitch or something to that effect. I dropped my briefcase on my desk and settled into my chair. I breathed a sign of relief and turned my computer on. It was going to be a long day but it would be one day closer to putting my life back together and putting that nightmare of a day behind me. Or so I had convinced myself.
It was a little after one before everyone realized I was back and it seemed like everyone and their dog dropped by to say hello. Most kept it short, “Hello, good to have you back.” Some hung around hoping to get the scoop on my almost wedding. All left when they realized that I wasn’t saying a word.
Before the end of the day an IM popped up from Ben. Ben and I had started at the office about the same time. Since we were about the same age, we had instantly bonded and became work buddies. We didn’t usually hang out after work because he usually had to get home to his girlfriend but we often went to lunch together and occasionally even happy hour.
ben: welcome back little lady!
me: i don’t know how welcome I feel but thanks!
ben: let me guess…amy trying to dig for scoop and everyone else casually walking by your office to say ‘hi’ but really hoping you’re gonna spill your guts
me: something like that. seems like nothing’s changed around here!
ben: other than me being incredibly bored without you, no it hasn’t. need a drink?
me: many…
ben: let’s hit happy hour at o’malley’s
me: can we leave now?
Ben: race you to the door
I grabbed my coat and purse and headed out careful to keep my head down so I didn’t have to return any of the pity smiles. Ben was at the door waiting for me.
“Let’s rock and roll, pretty lady.”
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