Cuz I Had a Bad Day

Because you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Do you ever have those days where you feel like punching the first person to invade your space just a little too much? Those days where you're pissed off at the world for no apparent reason. Days where you can't seem to shake that nagging feeling that life sucks. Where the world is spinning too fast and you are moving too slow.

Well, I'm having one of those days. I woke up on what I would consider the "right" side of the bed. Hell, logistically it WAS the right side of the bed. Yet before I knew it my day had gone to ordinary to shitty for no apparent reason.

It could be that I actually had to do work at work. Or it could be that I didn't get to spend the day cuddling with my boyfriend. Or it could be that I'm freezing my ass off and no one else is even the slightest bit cold. Yeah none of them reasons seem to reason a crappy a** day. Yet, here I am pissed off.

I think it's winter. I hate winter. It's so darn cold that I can't even stand to go outside. Not to mention that my downstairs at my house is freezing too because the heat doesn't work right. Oh no, there's no problem, according to my rental management. Sure. It's perfectly normal for it to be 50 degrees downstairs and 85 upstairs. Nothing strange about that.

Yes, you could say I'm in a bad mood but to be honest, venting really does help. Hooray for reactivating my blog!

Work vs School: Which Trumps Which?

Seems I've had this debate over and over again in the last six months or so. Having just graduated from college in May, I entered what so many call "the real world". Unlike others my age, I did not fear the real world but instead welcomed it. School had never been my forte - it had come too easy to me. I spent very little time on any of my classes and yet graduated with honors. How, you might ask? Skill I say, skill! Oh and a whole lot of brains... No not to be too conceited..back on subject!

My fiance (that still sounds so weird) graduated from college in December and began his so-called career on Friday. He is still in the transition phase. Once again last night over drinks and basketball at a local bar, the subject of work versus school: which trumps which came up? So I'm going to do my best to capture the pros and cons of each and come to a well-educated decision. First things first, school!

SCHOOL (and by school I mean college):
Pros:

• You only go to class usually about 12-18 hours per week depending on your course load.
• Some days you don't even have class
• Often when you do, it doesn't start until 9, 10, 11, 12 or if you're really lucky (or lazy), later!
• You get Thanksgiving Break, Christmas Break, summer break and the VERY VERY fun spring break (I should know I've done the Panama City thing).
• If you want to skip class, there's nothing stopping you and in fact, if your university is big enough, no one will even know.
• You can't be fired (but you can flunk out - I guess this would be a con).
• Endless frat parties, trips to the party and raging keggers and no one looks at you funny when you show up.

Cons:

• You don't get paid.
• In fact, not only do you not get paid but you pay to go.
• You don't always have weekends free or weeknights for that matter - they are often spent studying.
• After several years of hard work, you can flunk out and have nothing to show for your time or money except a few credit hours without a degree.
• Tests, tests and more tests.
• Unless your parents are helping out, you're probably working to pay your way through or even if they are you're working for beer money.
• At the end, there's an oh so large student loan bill with your name on it.

WORK

Pros:

• Earned Time Off, Vacation or whatever they call it - If you don't feel like going, don't!
• Benefits: Health Insurance, 401K, Dental, Life, whatever..the point is you're covered.
• 8-5 with a one hour lunch break.
• Weekends off.
• Paycheck, paycheck, PAYCHECK!
• All major and some not so major holidays off!
• You don't have to think about/or do work on weeknights or weekends. Can we say FREE WEEKENDS??

Cons:

• Monday through Friday 8-5 - it never fails.
• If you're not productive, you can get canned.
• Bosses and more bosses.
• Taxes - social security, state tax, federal tax, can you take any more of my money?
• Cubicle hell

Okay so let me tally up the results...math is not my strong suit so give me a few minutes....

....

....

School: 7 to 7 - they cancel each other out

Work: 7 to 5 - equaling 2 for the PROS side...Yay, work wins and I forgot to even mention money in your bank account. Yay!

I'm sure I missed some so you tell me: what are the pros and cons associated with school and work from your eyes?

He'll be coming around the mountain when he comes...

I could not be a military wife, girlfriend, mother, friend. It wouldn't work. I have come to that realization after spending 3 weeks away from my fiance. He has been on vacation in Australia since Christmas and is returning this evening. I can't wait to see him. It's been awful not having him here with me.

I have experienced what would happen if I was a military wife before. When I was 19, my boyfriend at the time enlisted in the National Guard. He left for the summer to go to boot camp and during that time I fell out of love with him. At first I missed him and it was hard but gradually I began to forget about him and his calls became more of an annoyance than a job. At the beginning I waited by the phone for his call. At the end, he was lucky if I even took the call. The day after he came back, I broke his heart. I still don't know if he's ever forgiven me.

Don't worry - there's no danger of that happening with my new fiance. I still love him and missed him terribly while he was gone and can't wait for him to return. However, I did notice that the more days that went by the less I thought about him (but I still thought about him lots).

I just think it would be hard to have your husband be gone for months, years at a time. At some point you have to stop yourself from thinking about him, relying on him and become more independent. You become a singular unit instead of this collective Mr. and Mrs. And at some point when he returns he throws your whole life out of whack. You have someone who you have to call if you're going to be late, you have someone you have to consult before making decisions. It's just different.

With that being said, I am so thankful that my fiance is not in the military. Don't get me wrong I would be extremely proud of him and support him wholly, it would just be hard and I don't think I'm cut out for that. I give props to the countless women (and men) who do it every day.

Bling Bling

For those of you who started reading my blog over a year and a half ago, the day you never thought would happen has finally came. I am ENGAGED complete with a sparkling diamond ring.

In a move that took me by complete surprise, my boyfriend of two years proposed to me on Sunday, December 17. It was the most romantic proposal and he had done a lot of planning to make it special and it truly was. He graduated from college and the following day he proposed to me. Later when talking to his family he told them that he got two really great things this weekend: a college degree and as of ten minutes ago, a fiancé. It was amazing to hear him call me his fiancé.

The crazy thing was that he had the ring for three months before proposing just waiting until the perfect time to do it. He wanted it to be a surprise and a special moment that I would remember forever. He accomplished that. I could not love my future husband anymore than I do!

Now that I’m engaged the wedding planning begins and to tell you the truth, I wasn’t prepared for what this entailed. I thought it would be fun and easy. I was wrong. It’s overwhelming. It’s tiring. It’s stressful. Most of all, it’s just not me. I don’t like doing it. I am torn on whether to have the big tadoo or fly across the ocean and tie the knot there.

On one hand, I want my family and friends to all be there to witness the special moment in our lives. I want to have a big fun reception where we can party and celebrate this momentous occasion. On the other hand, I don’t want to put in the work to have a big tadoo. I’ve always wanted to get married in a gazebo by water and if I went to Hawaii or Mexico or Jamaica, I could do just that. On the downside: all my family and friends would get to witness it. On the even further downhill side, I wouldn’t get as many presents. Yes, I am greedy.

What to do, what to do? I have no idea. I guess I’ll probably do the big wedding since that is what my fiancé wants and deep down what I really want to. At least I have a year to plan this wedding. We’re getting married next New Year’s Eve. It should be quite a celebration. A countdown to the rest of our lives…the clock starts now!