Here it is: the final installment in my serial story. Leave me a comment if you think I should continue this story and help Addy find "The One". To be continued, maybe...
“So tell me, was it when I was walking down the aisle that you decided I just wasn’t pretty enough; wasn’t sweet enough; wasn’t whatever you needed enough or when was it?”
“No, Addy. Not at all.” He stood now and walked toward me slowly. He grabbed my wrists tenderly.
“It wasn’t like that. I saw you walk down the aisle – so beautiful, so innocent and full of love in your eyes and that’s when I knew. I knew I didn't deserve you. You deserved a guy who could appreciate you. Who realized how wonderful you were, perfect in every way. You deserved a guy who wouldn’t cheat on you, who wouldn’t break your heart, who wouldn’t ruin your life. And I knew, Addy. I knew I wasn’t that guy. Don’t you see? You were too good for me.”
I cried. I hadn’t meant to but I cried. Brad pulled me close and hugged me. He was the last person I wanted a hug from right now and the only person I needed one from. The story was far from perfect. In fact, it was downright awful but somehow it eased my pain. I still loved Brad. Nothing could stop that. I knew a part of me would probably always love Brad but the other part of me was glad. Glad that he didn’t marry me. Glad that he was able to walk away. Because I wasn't strong enough to.
I knew he wasn’t the one. I had always knew he wasn’t the one but I had wanted to marry him anyways because I wasn’t sure “The One” would ever find me. Would ever love me for who I am. Would ever fit so perfectly in my life as Brad had. I wasn’t sure “The One” was anything more than a myth. But here I was back at square one letting Mr. Wrong walk out of my life – not by choice – and starting over again. Waiting for the magic. Waiting for the love. Waiting for “The One.” And if they were all wrong and there was no such thing as “The One.” There was always me. And somehow that would have to be good enough.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
One Wrong Step
“You went to her house the night before our wedding? After our rehearsal? After we had sat at the church with the preacher and all of our wedding party practicing for our wedding day, you went to your whore’s house. That’s so lovely, Brad.”
“Don’t pass judgment. I was going to break it off. I swear I was. But then she was there crying on the bed. She told me she was pregnant and that I was the dad. She told me she was going to keep the baby and I could be a part of its life or not. It was up to me.”
“I thought about getting up and leaving right there but she was so vulnerable so sad. I knew I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I didn’t stand by her and help her take care of that baby – our baby. We stayed up talking all night and somewhere during the night, I fell for her.”
“You fell for her? On our wedding night, you fell for another woman.”
“Night before our wedding night.”
“Same difference.”
“So it seems apparent you knew at least 12 hours before the wedding that you weren’t going to marry me so why put me through the misery, pain of getting ready, walking down the aisle and then leaving me standing there?”
“I was torn. I loved you. I loved her. She was having my baby but I was marrying you. I didn’t know what to do or who I loved more. I thought that if you married me everything would somehow be okay and I could have both.”
“Both?” I let out a evil laugh. “What did you think? The three of us were just going to live happily ever after? Come on now, Brad. That’s ridiculous.”
“The point is that I was thinking at all. I was scared. I was confused. I was torn between the two women that I loved and one of them was having my baby. What would you have done?”
“I don’t know. Maybe not have slept with another woman. Not have carried on an affair while my fiancé was planning our wedding. Not have been stupid enough to get her pregnant. Not have continued this charade until my wedding day and left my bride at the altar. That’s what I would have done, Brad.”
I was fired up now. Livid. I was seeing red. If Brad made one wrong move, I knew I would KO him right here in my living room.
“Don’t pass judgment. I was going to break it off. I swear I was. But then she was there crying on the bed. She told me she was pregnant and that I was the dad. She told me she was going to keep the baby and I could be a part of its life or not. It was up to me.”
“I thought about getting up and leaving right there but she was so vulnerable so sad. I knew I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I didn’t stand by her and help her take care of that baby – our baby. We stayed up talking all night and somewhere during the night, I fell for her.”
“You fell for her? On our wedding night, you fell for another woman.”
“Night before our wedding night.”
“Same difference.”
“So it seems apparent you knew at least 12 hours before the wedding that you weren’t going to marry me so why put me through the misery, pain of getting ready, walking down the aisle and then leaving me standing there?”
“I was torn. I loved you. I loved her. She was having my baby but I was marrying you. I didn’t know what to do or who I loved more. I thought that if you married me everything would somehow be okay and I could have both.”
“Both?” I let out a evil laugh. “What did you think? The three of us were just going to live happily ever after? Come on now, Brad. That’s ridiculous.”
“The point is that I was thinking at all. I was scared. I was confused. I was torn between the two women that I loved and one of them was having my baby. What would you have done?”
“I don’t know. Maybe not have slept with another woman. Not have carried on an affair while my fiancé was planning our wedding. Not have been stupid enough to get her pregnant. Not have continued this charade until my wedding day and left my bride at the altar. That’s what I would have done, Brad.”
I was fired up now. Livid. I was seeing red. If Brad made one wrong move, I knew I would KO him right here in my living room.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Storytime
“I met her one night when I went out with the guys. You were at home with a cold. It started out innocently but gradually as I got drunker she started to get more flirtatious and by the end of the night she was full on coming on to me. I didn’t intend for anything to happen but I was so drunk, Addy. Somehow I ended up back at her place and one thing led to another and before I knew it we had slept together.”
“And it was just that one time?”
“Not exactly.”
Those weren’t the words I had wanted to hear.
“I came home the next day and felt so guilty. You gave me the third degree about where I had stayed but you bought my story that Tommy had made me crash at his place. I wanted to confess it all to you right then and there but knew that you would never be able to forgive me. I thought it was just a one-night stand so I decided the best thing for both of us would be to just not say anything.”
“I don’t think you thought about me at all in this decision, Brad. You were just protecting your own ass.”
“Do you want me to finish or what?”
I nodded as he continued.
“I didn’t know that I had given her my number and she started calling me. At first I ignored the calls but finally I picked up. She said she really needed to see me and asked that I meet her right away. At first I resisted but finally I agreed to meet her at her house. When I got there she had planned this whole seduction scene. I should have turned and left right then but for some reason, I didn’t. I went in and she seduced me. Next thing I knew I had done it again. I came home feeling awful. I could hardly look at you. I didn’t know what I was going to say or do. You were so excited about the wedding that I didn’t want to break your heart so I just went along with everything.
“Didn’t want to break my heart? Oh you did a find job of that, Brad. A fine job. Why don’t you just skip the nasty sex stories – they make me sick and skip to when you found out she was pregnant and decided that you were going to leave me standing at the altar like an idiot.”
“I swear I didn’t find out until the night before our wedding, Addy. We had been sleeping together for about four months but I fully intended to break it off that night. I went to her house…”
“And it was just that one time?”
“Not exactly.”
Those weren’t the words I had wanted to hear.
“I came home the next day and felt so guilty. You gave me the third degree about where I had stayed but you bought my story that Tommy had made me crash at his place. I wanted to confess it all to you right then and there but knew that you would never be able to forgive me. I thought it was just a one-night stand so I decided the best thing for both of us would be to just not say anything.”
“I don’t think you thought about me at all in this decision, Brad. You were just protecting your own ass.”
“Do you want me to finish or what?”
I nodded as he continued.
“I didn’t know that I had given her my number and she started calling me. At first I ignored the calls but finally I picked up. She said she really needed to see me and asked that I meet her right away. At first I resisted but finally I agreed to meet her at her house. When I got there she had planned this whole seduction scene. I should have turned and left right then but for some reason, I didn’t. I went in and she seduced me. Next thing I knew I had done it again. I came home feeling awful. I could hardly look at you. I didn’t know what I was going to say or do. You were so excited about the wedding that I didn’t want to break your heart so I just went along with everything.
“Didn’t want to break my heart? Oh you did a find job of that, Brad. A fine job. Why don’t you just skip the nasty sex stories – they make me sick and skip to when you found out she was pregnant and decided that you were going to leave me standing at the altar like an idiot.”
“I swear I didn’t find out until the night before our wedding, Addy. We had been sleeping together for about four months but I fully intended to break it off that night. I went to her house…”
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Answers
Back by popular demand...my continuing story in installments. If you go back to May, maybe even April you will see the first four installments of the story and see where we left off. We last left our beloved Addy KOed on the ground by The Devil. Enjoy. The final installments will promptly be delivered over the next few days!
It must have been five, maybe ten minutes before I came to. Brad was standing over me and I could tell he was worried.
"Addy? Addy? Addy, are you okay?"
It all started to come back to me.
"Where is that bitch? That orange dragon bitch. I'm taking her down."
"I made her leave, Addy. I'm sorry. I didn't know she had followed me. I sent her home. I'll take care of her later. Right now I'm worried about you. You were out quite a little while. Are you sure you're okay?"
Honestly I wasn't. My head felt like I had a massive hangover and I could see blood and was pretty sure that my nose was broke. But I wasn't letting that stop me.
"A girl who hits other girls? That's pretty white trash, Brad. Are you proud of your baby mama?"
"Don't call her that."
"What? White trash or baby mama? Because both are true."
"Well, judging from the insults you're hurling I guess you're okay. I'm going to get my stuff and go."
"The hell you are."
By now I was on my feet and positioned between the door and the stairs.
"You're not going anywhere. Set your ass down."
I must have sounded more bad ass than I felt because he did just as I said sitting down on the loveseat. He laid his head down in his hands and then rubbed his hands through his hair.
The time to get answers was now or never. I could tell his guard was down.
"Where do you want me to start?" he asked.
"How about the beginning?"
He took a deep breath and started a story that was sure to be the final splinter in my heart.
It must have been five, maybe ten minutes before I came to. Brad was standing over me and I could tell he was worried.
"Addy? Addy? Addy, are you okay?"
It all started to come back to me.
"Where is that bitch? That orange dragon bitch. I'm taking her down."
"I made her leave, Addy. I'm sorry. I didn't know she had followed me. I sent her home. I'll take care of her later. Right now I'm worried about you. You were out quite a little while. Are you sure you're okay?"
Honestly I wasn't. My head felt like I had a massive hangover and I could see blood and was pretty sure that my nose was broke. But I wasn't letting that stop me.
"A girl who hits other girls? That's pretty white trash, Brad. Are you proud of your baby mama?"
"Don't call her that."
"What? White trash or baby mama? Because both are true."
"Well, judging from the insults you're hurling I guess you're okay. I'm going to get my stuff and go."
"The hell you are."
By now I was on my feet and positioned between the door and the stairs.
"You're not going anywhere. Set your ass down."
I must have sounded more bad ass than I felt because he did just as I said sitting down on the loveseat. He laid his head down in his hands and then rubbed his hands through his hair.
The time to get answers was now or never. I could tell his guard was down.
"Where do you want me to start?" he asked.
"How about the beginning?"
He took a deep breath and started a story that was sure to be the final splinter in my heart.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
The Hills, The Hills, The Hills!
Next Monday The Hills comes back to MTV and I for one can't wait. This is one of my favorite shows and Lauren Conrad is one of my favorite people that I don't know! I loved her on Laguna Beach and I loved her on season one and two of The Hills. I am looking forward to following her life in LA for another season.
My excitement for the season is being derailed by my utter disgust for Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag. They are the worst excuse for human beings I've ever seen. For non-Hills watchers, Heidi and Lauren used to be best friends until Spencer decided he wanted Heidi all to himself and brainwashed her to hate Lauren.
The latest in this terrible twosome if them attacking Lauren on the radio stations and on Spencer's Web site (which by the way doesn't even work he's so pathetic). It's one thing to say you don't like somebody but it's another to complete ream them by calling them rude, inappropriate names and making up lies (like the sex tape). I listened to their interview on the Ryan Secrest show and they sounded like immature junior high kids who had no life (which is true).
They went on and on about how Lauren was mean to them in US Weekly for SIX pages. But I read the US Weekly article and she was anything but mean. In usual politically correct style, Lauren commented politely that they weren't friends anymore and that too many things had happened. She did not call them names like a five-year-old. She did not make fun of them. She simply stated the facts.
Does anyone know how to contact MTV? I would really love to start a petition to get Heidi and Spencer of this season of The Hills! Please help...
My excitement for the season is being derailed by my utter disgust for Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag. They are the worst excuse for human beings I've ever seen. For non-Hills watchers, Heidi and Lauren used to be best friends until Spencer decided he wanted Heidi all to himself and brainwashed her to hate Lauren.
The latest in this terrible twosome if them attacking Lauren on the radio stations and on Spencer's Web site (which by the way doesn't even work he's so pathetic). It's one thing to say you don't like somebody but it's another to complete ream them by calling them rude, inappropriate names and making up lies (like the sex tape). I listened to their interview on the Ryan Secrest show and they sounded like immature junior high kids who had no life (which is true).
They went on and on about how Lauren was mean to them in US Weekly for SIX pages. But I read the US Weekly article and she was anything but mean. In usual politically correct style, Lauren commented politely that they weren't friends anymore and that too many things had happened. She did not call them names like a five-year-old. She did not make fun of them. She simply stated the facts.
Does anyone know how to contact MTV? I would really love to start a petition to get Heidi and Spencer of this season of The Hills! Please help...
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